Welcome to Planning in Peace! As the author of many bestselling wedding books, I've been honored to work with iVillage on this blog and at my Q&A message board, both of which I invite you to explore as you get ready to dive into wedding-planning world. With so much excitement ahead of you, I can assure you that even if you and your groom will take on the majority of the planning and payment for the wedding, you're still going to work with and deal with all of the people around you (including your vendors) and if you're like most brides, you'll be on the receiving end of a lot of 'suggestions' and perhaps some pressure and stress when your friends and loved ones speak up...or take a looong time returning your e-mails.

One of the most stressful things that may come to you in the upcoming months is a sense of disappointment that people aren't acting the way you'd like them to. While most of your friends are thrilled to pop a champagne cork in your honor, there might be that one who rolls her eyes and seems to resent your relationship success. While you may have expected your mom to be enthusiastic about the wedding plans, maybe she's being a little too quiet about them. It's at this point that a lot of brides freak out, get hurt, and nurse a big load of resentment that colors the rest of the wedding planning season a very unflattering color.

I could tell you not to worry about what some people do, but we all know those envious or uninvolved friends and family are going to take up space in your mind. So here's one little rescue for you...

Don't jump to conclusions.

You don't know why someone isn't reacting the way you'd like them to. Even if you ask directly, you might not get a straight answer. I've spoken with the so-called Quiet Mom, and you may be surprised to know that they say they're being quiet because they don't want to be That Mom who becomes bossy and controlling., They're trying to stay in control, so they think it's best to just zip it and wait for the bride to tell them what to do. Quiet, for them, doesn't mean disinterest. It's just how they chose to prevent a problem. It didn't work, because they went too far in the opposite direction, but I use them as an example of 'you can't read minds.' As for that envious bridesmaid or sister, she may be an easy read or she's having a tough time at work, in school, in her own relationship, with money, with her health, with her kids....you never know.

So if someone isn't acting the way you'd like, just offer your support, check in with that person to talk about non-wedding stuff before you get to any wedding business, and make sure you're spending more time with your cork-popping friends and family so that your enthusiasm doesn't dry up.

And don't give in to the #1 enemy of Planning in Peace: gossip. More on that poison in an upcoming blog post...

Do you have questions for me? Post them on my message board, and you'll get not only my advice but the wisdom and warnings of our terrific iVillage Weddings community.