Don't try to 'diagnose' the Mom! You may have some really good theories about why your mom or mom-in-law has lost her mind, but it does no good to approach her with 'I know you're just feeling adrift because of empty nest syndrome' or 'I know you weren't happy with your original wedding, so you're trying to get your Do-Over through our wedding now.' Yikes! Especially if you deliver these lines with a dramatic degree of faux-empathy, this is just condescending and will fire up a conflict like you could never imagine. "Who are you to tell me what my 'issue' is?!" is the battle cry of the Mom who is now going to fight you at every step.

Even if you were trying to be understanding, if your intentions were good, it's never a good idea to tell Mom she has issues. So keep your focus on your goals, what you'd like to accomplish as you work with her, and show your dedication to building a relationship with her by taking her out to lunch, or sending her a thank you e-mail.

And think about it...how would you like it if she diagnosed you with "Oh, she's just stressed out because she has cold feet and doesn't really want to get married?"