Over on the Ask the Wedding Etiquette Expert message board, we've got some debate going on about guests who attend a wedding and don't bring a gift. The dialogue has been enlightening, with some people voicing strong opinions...about The Issue. And that's an important thing to keep in mind for your own peace, since I'm seeing that some inflamed reactions about The Issue can easily slide into being taken as personal attacks. So when you're overwhelmed and others are dialed up to Level 10 intensity, step out of the conversation for a second to remind yourself The Issue is what has everyone so up in arms. Even if they don't like how you're doing things, an intense reaction often comes from their previous experiences with The Issue. It's not always 100% about your doing something wrong, so don't take it personally and lose your sense of peace. Just focus on your goals and trust your own instincts to operate out of a sense of graciousness, good etiquette and patience in all things.